Potty Training - Day 1

I'd say that the first day of potty training was a total success! We got 5 pees on the potty and Phoenix knows what we want her to do when we sit her on the toilet. The time where she sits and fiddles around before peeing has dramatically reduced from about 15 minutes to 1-2 minutes. This tells me that 1. She has figured out that she is supposed to pee when she sits on the potty and that 2. She is gaining better control of using her muscles. Both of these accomplishments are really good news in the potty training process!

I have read a lot the the low muscle tone can really delay potty training in kids with DS. Having low tone can mean that the way that our kids feel their muscles can be reduced. Phoenix is now at the upper end of the age range for potty training of typical kids. So the fact that she is showing interest and some level of control is very, very good news.

Will she be potty trained for when she goes to preschool in the fall? Who knows? But 5 pees in the potty is something to celebrate!

Potty training

We've been introducing the idea of potty training for some time now. Phoenix has been watching the Potty Time dvd since she turned two and we bought a potty insert shortly thereafter. She can say potty, she can sign potty, and in general she feel really positive about the whole potty experience. We started a routine where as we got ready for bath time every night Phoenix sat on the potty. The only mistake about this is that now Phoenix believes that potty times happens butt naked. Oops. We'll chalk that one up to first time parenting missteps.

She's gone through phases where she liked to sit on the potty for a while, where she wanted to get on and then off and now where she sits on the potty until she pees or poops. It's been a progression. A process. A learning curve. I finally feel that we might be at a place where we could make a commitment to really attempt potty training. Her day home provider let me know that she has been expressing interest while there and has peed on the potty a number of times in the past week.

So last night we bought our first box of pull ups. I feel like these will be a good transition for Phoenix where she can practise (with help) pulling her pants up and down while we take her to the potty each hour. We are going to keep it really positive (we clap and cheer when she successfully uses the potty) and see if she will eventually start initiating (requesting) trips to the bathroom on he own. Obviously we are going to be initiating first but the idea is for her to become more aware of what is happening with her body.

I had originally planned to initiate potty training this summer, but since Phoenix has been using the potty successfully before bath time, I can't see the harm in trying now while she is showing interest. Strike while the iron is hot and all that.

By the way, Sunday is the day we are going to start. We have nothing to do that day so we have the time to commit to this enterprise. I'll let you know how it goes.

DS catch phrases

I hate overused phrases. I hate them. When I hear them, they make me cringe. One of my 'favorite' examples is "If I can help/save just ONE person from (insert grievous experience here) it will all have been worth it" Puke, gag, cough, vomit. It is just so...trite. And self serving. And used a million times. Can't people come up with something better than this? Anything?

Down Syndrome catch phrases drive me equally as crazy. "More alike than different" "My child isn't defined by DS" "My child is a person first". I cannot even tell you have many times I have heard or read these phrases in the past 3 years. I'm sure they aren't as obvious or annoying to those outside the DS community, but to me they are like nails on a chalkboard. "My child is a person first" is the worst. Um, of course they are a person. They are a very small person with a unique genetic makeup. Can anyone honestly tell me that they think that our kids are perceived as anything but a human being?

And with a whole community of moms and parents who blog and write about our experiences with DS, can't we come up with anything more original? Or that even makes sense?

"More alike than different". Really? Do typical kids have a team of professionals who oversee their care? How many typical parents can claim to consult with OT's. PT's, SLP's, EI, a pediatrician, an optimologist, an audiologist and a family doctor? This year we have also seen a cardiologist, an ENT and a sleep clinic. And my daughter is healthy! We just monitor her progress! How exactly is this more alike?

Why can't we just be honest? Our lives with our kids are more complicated. It's not bad. It's not unmanageable. But it is different than raising typical children. It is. I think we come off as disingenuous when we claim otherwise. And it is a criticism of our community that has merit. Because when we claim that it is just like raising typical kids people think we are lying or minimising the struggles that our children will have in life.

It feels normal to us, because we have adapted to our new normal. But it is not alike. And I for one am not going to claim it is.

Here's an idea. Lets come up with new slogans and descriptions of our kids. Here's one I thought of yesterday: "Down syndrome: as individual as you or me". How about "Down syndrome: see the ability".  Phrases and descriptions like this are honest, authentic and more representative of the reality of Down syndrome today. It doesn't minimise any of our kids struggles and it doesn't marginalize them or set them apart.

Oh, and if anyone wants to pass these phrases on to a National DS group for marketing purposes, please do, but I'd like credit please. And royalties.