Saturday, 19 January 2013

Obnoxious

Is it obnoxious to brag about your kids accomplishments? Am I that mom, who talks about how great their kid is and only serves to piss off those around her who get tired of hearing how wonderful Phoenix is?

I don't know, that's why I'm asking. I talk to moms of typical kids pretty openly about how great Phoenix is developing. They seem to appreciate the updates and obvious pride I have for her. But with fellow DS parents I find I try to hold back a bit, at least in person. I don't want anyone to think that our children's development is a competition, because it is not. The fact that she is progressing well doesn't imply anything other than she is progressing well. I don't work harder than any of the other mom's I know to help my kid progress. We all work hard to help our kids and they all progress at their own rate. I think all our kids have bright futures. But I can't help but wonder if it pisses them off anyway.

Phoenix had a great assessment today. We went to our child development centre and met with the SLP first and then the PT. The SLP performed a standardized test on Phoe to measure her speech and language ability and then charted her results into percentiles. The results were amazing. Phoe falls at the 80th percentile for speech language, which is just under the normal range for her age group. So this is a mild/moderate delay. And yes, this is me jumping up and down with excitement that my child has a mild/moderate delay. Because you know what? Most children with DS have severe language delays early on. Language frequently takes much longer to emerge and progress in our kids. So the fact that she scored as high as she did is phenomenal.

But, we needed the PT assessment to come out lower in order for Phoenix to qualify for her preschool funding. To receive this funding children must have a severe delay in one area or mild/moderate delays in several areas.

Her PT assessment went well but she still only scored in the 2nd percentile, mainly because she can't run or jump. Surprisingly, this is considered moderate as well. Which makes me wonder, if  98 out of 100 children score higher than Phoenix on this test and this is considered a moderate delay, exactly how flipping delayed do you have to be to be considered severe?

So Phoenix has several moderate delays. That's wicked. And I am not being sarcastic. Because I know she is delayed. No one needs to tell me this. I can see with my own eyes that she does not have the same skills as the other kids at play gym. And she doesn't talk as well as they do. But she is trying, and learning and growing and having fun. And her delays are not considered severe, although I would love her just the same if they were.

So today I am celebrating. I celebrate her strengths, her weaknesses, and her presence in our family. Life is good. And if that is obnoxious, I don't care one little bit.

3 comments:

  1. Brag away Jo, there's no reason to hold back! It's not obnoxious, it's being a proud mom and you should be, Phoe is doing incredible!

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    1. Thanks Jen! Anaya is pretty stellar too. Is she going to preschool this fall?

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  2. Yep, probably at PREP, but not 100% for sure yet. Where's Phoe going?

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