Sunday, 7 June 2015


Today marks 4 days since Sday. It's been pretty stressful, but today there had been a slight easing of the pressure and devastation we all have been experiencing.

The worst day by far was Thursday. For me that meant a frantic scramble to get a sick note for a leave of absence from my teaching position. This involved 4 calls to my doctors office, 3 visits to 2 different walk in clinics because it turns out that only the clinic your family doctor is in will provide you a note for a stress leave because another walk in clinic couldn't possibly verify second hand information and it wasn't as if the stroke happened to me. 

That doctor (and his receptionist) were given a piece oft mind for agreeing to take the appointment at all when I was very clear from the beginning what I was looking for. 

Kudos to me for despite losing my shit a number of times that day, not once did I verbally insult or personally attack anyone   

There were quite a few F bombs dropped, there's no doubt about it, but I kept my head (and ethics) despite being in the middle of a stress meltdown. I rock.  

I finally did get my sick note, but it involved loading all three kids into the van in a rainstorm and letting Phoenix go where ever she wanted in the doctors office, just to prove a point (that they should have given me an appointment and not made me come as a walk in).

The low points were contrasted with some surprising moments of levity. Like when the stroke research assistant was chatting with us and I asked her how many research participants she gets a day. She replied "Well, on a good day I get 3!" 

I got to use my ironic "You didn't REALLY say that out loud did you?" look that I save for when people make total assess of themselves because they speak without thinking. We were all good natured enough to laugh it off, but my feeling is that she'll never say that to anyone ever again. 

There was also the emergency room nurse who told is about how bad her day was because it was a new hospital and she couldn't find any of the supplies. 

Or when the neurologist told us that we should be optimistic about Mikes recovery and I replied "Oh, don't worry, Mike's full of optimism, he's an Oilers fan". 

Yesterday seemed to be the worst for all of us. Mike was pretty low about the loss of muscle strength in his left arm and just how long a road it could be to get full function back. And I feel bad for Mike, at what he is going through and that this happened to him at all. 

Phoenix is a bright point for Mike, and an area where I can emphasise parallels. "Look how long it took Phoenix to walk, but she got there, didn't she?" "It's harder for her than the other kids but she always keeps trying". It's really inspiring to be honest. Because she does keep on trying, again and again. She's a fantastic role model for Mike to have. 

Right now we are telling Phoenix that Mike is with the doctors and that he is happy (she's very concerned that he is happy so we emphasise that he is). She didn't react too well to him on Fri during a visit, I think because she picked up on the intense emotions he was feeling about the stroke and about fatherhood and how it will all look like with this new disability. 

I'm hoping that everyone has calmed down enough that we can have an enjoyable visit tomorrow. As important as it is for Phoenix to see her dad, it is even more important for Mike to see that he can be a good dad, even with the loss of some of the function of his body (hopefully temporarily).

That's it for now. I'll update soon. 

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